The Heartbreak
So I’m reading this book, and in it, one of the main characters, a man, gets his heart spat upon by a woman. This utterly destroys him. It got me thinking about the way men and women treat heartbreak.
I remember the first time I got dumped. It was the worst time as well. I was in grade 12 and was dating a guy named Scott. I don’t remember the particulars of why he dumped me, but I remember the way my heart was in actual physical pain. I remember telling a girl in class the next day about it, and then she started talking about something else. The fact that she could even think of anything other than the turmoil I was in was incomprehensible to me. And it went on like that for the whole day until Scott and I got back together in 6th period.
I don’t think I’ve ever quite felt as wretched as I did that day ever again. Probably because I don’t think I’ve been formally dumped since…most of the others just ignored my phone calls until I got the hint. I still feel rotten when I realize it, but since we women fall so frequently, our ability to get back up is quite spectacular. We cry our eyeballs out for 30 minutes, write the nastiest e-mails we can think of to the guy but don’t send it, call up our girlfriends so they can remind us how much better we are than him anyway, then buy a tub of ice cream and call it a night.
Men on the other hand, they don’t fall in love as often as we do, but when they do, they fall hard. So when we, the women, decide that we’re too good for them and move on, it’s much harder for them to take. They do things like curl up naked sobbing next to the water heater, vomit, or write “Darcie has AIDS” on the wall in the men’s room.
You know, as I reread that last paragraph, I really wonder why it’s the women that are pegged as crazy?
May 28th, 2009 at 8:56 am
I’ve never had my heart broken, probably because I’ve never fallen…
And I think that my lack of emotions and personality would shield me from that anyway…
May 28th, 2009 at 9:06 am
Shield you from getting hurt? That’s a horrible way to live.
May 28th, 2009 at 9:41 am
Girls are pegged as crazy because they are surface crazy. Men don’t get that rep because we have deep down crazy, a much crazier form of crazy. Crazy girls will do quirky, little things due to temporary craziness, which result in an eye roll and a few laughs. Crazy guys will hold it in for a decade then do something that results in jail time.
May 28th, 2009 at 10:09 am
Hmmm, maybe that came out wrong… I mean shield me as in I don’t know if I would really feel it as hard as some overly emotional guy… I tend to think on an extremely logical plain, so I could probably rationalize it out and not get that overly broken up about it… I mean sure, I’d probably be disappointed to say the least, but I wouldn’t be bawling to my friends about it…
Of course, I say that now…
May 28th, 2009 at 10:34 am
When guys get their heartbroken it always remedied by one simple age-old fool-proof method.
Get drunk and nail a fat chick.
I’m not sure how that makes anyone feel better, but it happens 10 times out of 10.
May 28th, 2009 at 11:03 am
Teenwolf, with all the disease that runs around these days, I hope 10 times out of 10 people are careful!!!!
Darcie, that part about writing nasty emails and then not sending, occasionally it was a bad enough break up, my finger was just to quick and would hit send. That’s the problem with email and the internet, if you’re a little too crushed, hitting send is a little too tempting, and easy to do! lol
May 28th, 2009 at 11:23 am
Dan, expertly put. You are a craziness guru.
Randy, I think you would be devastated more than anyone.
Teenwolf, isn’t that how you spend most of your weekends anyway?
Drummerg217, the deal I make with myself is that I don’t turn on my computer when I’m intoxicated. This usually prevents me from hitting send. I don’t know exactly how I manage, but I always stick to that rule.
May 28th, 2009 at 11:41 am
Ahhh. I only turn off my computer when I’m leaving town. :) And I’m not drunk when I send something like that. You may have noticed I have a hint of red in my hair. You know what they say about red heads…Sometimes my temper rises, and that’s when the send key is pounded into tomorrow! (This hasn’t happened in a long time, as I haven’t had time, made time, or found anyone worth having a relationship with. :)
May 28th, 2009 at 11:44 am
See, when I get dumped, I guess I spend my time plotting revenge in the way that causes physical pain…not so much with an e-mail.
May 28th, 2009 at 11:46 am
I want my ‘blowing a kiss’ picture, Darcie!
um, wait, that would mean giving you my real email address or setting up a new fake one, which i’m too lazy to do….can you just post the pic along with your next blog post????
I don’t mind sharing :-)
May 28th, 2009 at 11:48 am
Marty, you’ve been taken care of: http://www.fitdarcie.com/kiss-for-marty-mcfly/
May 28th, 2009 at 12:12 pm
swooooon and schwiiiinnnng!
Marty’s flux capacitors running in overdrive.
May 28th, 2009 at 1:45 pm
Men in my experience are much different than they are made to be percieved by society. Most (all) men I’ve dated are much more emotional and sensitive than I am. Although, I don’t cry, ever. But, I’ve seen my boyfriends cry over things my girlfriends or even my mother wouldn’t cry over. The funny thing is, I tend to go for guys that are outwardly very manly, I can’t even imagine if I were to date a metro.
May 28th, 2009 at 1:47 pm
Yes, men are sissys.
I dated a metrosexual once. I actually didn’t mind it for the most part. I left him thinking he was gay, but we got along ok.
May 28th, 2009 at 3:30 pm
I haven’t been dumped, but I have done it a few times. It was pretty horrible. One girl cried for over an hour, another one actually threw up and the other time it was mutual, so we went back to bed and parted ways the next day. Two of those three I still talk to. I went through a fair amount of anguish as the dumper, so I can only imagine the pain of being the dumpee. But then, I am a bit of a pansy when it comes to a lot of things. Not a crier though. Well, that one time… we got the beer all mopped up and I moved on with another though.
I am also a manly man… I drink scotch, play hockey and can start a fire.
May 28th, 2009 at 4:16 pm
Is that what makes a man manly? I don’t do any of those things, so I guess I’m pretty femmy.
May 28th, 2009 at 5:34 pm
I currently have my toenails painted silver. I’m a manly man.