The Number
I was out with some friends last night and the subject of the number came up. By number I mean the number of people someone has slept with. The question was, what’s a good number? I’m pretty sure asking this question to a partner went out of style right around the time I applied for University, but I wonder if I would tell the truth or lie if someone asked me this questions. The answer is probably relative, but I want to present 2 scenarios to you.
1) You’ve been with someone for a few years and you love that person. You guys are about to get married. You’ve always thought that you had a pretty good guess of what your fiance’s number is, but very shortly before the wedding, you find out that the number is astronomically higher than you expected. I doubt anyone is going to say that they would call off the wedding, but does this change the way you perceive your fiance? Does it make any difference at all?
2) You’re at a bar and you’re chatting someone up all night. You guys are really hitting it off. You know for a fact that you are NOT going to be doing it that night. There is the possibility that you could go out with that person again, and it could be a quick lay, or it could go into a meaningful relationship. Then you find out that they have slept with 100 more people that you have. Does your opinion of that person change? Do you automatically decide that you will not enter into a relationship with that person, but rather you would try to get some sex, then bolt?
November 20th, 2009 at 11:32 am
In response to your questions:
1- No I wouldnt care at all. As long as shes not interested in sleeping with anyone else, I dont care who she is, where shes from, what (or who) she did, as long as she loves me (sorry, I couldnt resist that :D).
2- Im not sure about this one. It depends on how we hit it off. If we really really really hit it off, then maybe Id just do the one night stand and bolt. But as a general rule of thumb, if youre over 100, its a bad thing. Youre either too loose, or have an std, or are incapable of staying with someone for more than a few days. But thats just my opinion.
By the way, fitdarce, what range is your number in? Is it over 50? Over 75? Over 100? Over 150?!?!
November 20th, 2009 at 11:56 am
So 100 is the number you think is too much?
I wont reveal where I sit. I find it interesting that people assume I sleep around from reading my blog. I so rarely touch the sex subject directly, and have never actually spoken about sleeping with anyone.
November 20th, 2009 at 3:54 pm
1) Nah. Doesn’t change anything. As long as she’s hasn’t been a ho for a while, then all is good. After all, it’s like a self-cleaning oven so if it hasn’t cooked a lot of food lately, it will be clean.
2) Three words…”double bag it” … then you’re good to go.
November 20th, 2009 at 5:37 pm
Good question - I’d veer towards complete honesty.
Maybe I’m too honest for my own good. haha
November 21st, 2009 at 12:51 pm
@Marty, so then if you knew someone had a high number before you met her, you automatically put her in the sex-only category?
@Will, people don’t actually ask that question do they?
November 21st, 2009 at 2:03 pm
@ Darcie, so youre one of those girls that goes out a lot, potentially fools around quite a bit, but rarely goes all the way arent you? I sort of suspected. By the way, is 44 high? My friends say Im a man whore, but I think 44 is average for a guy in his mid twenties. Right?
@ Marty, LOL!!!! Self cleaning oven. But I think it depends very much on circumstance. For example, if shes 35, and is at 132, thats not too bad, because its only about 8 year (assuming her first was at 18). But if shes 21 and at 135, then theres something seriously wrong with her, and Im not touching that without a rubber hazmat suit. On top of that, if she had a slutty period in college or something where she had like 5 in one night for a month or something, but for the past few years shes toned it down, then its ok.
Oh and I forgot to mention that she has to mention, regardless of number, that she gets tested regularly. Even if its 1, I dont know who or what that other guy was doing before her.